Planning a Wedding Never Dreamed Of

I've been engaged for two months as of today, and initially wanted to just run to Vegas and get the thing done. I've never been one of those girls who dreamed of the fairytale wedding and planned every detail before I had found my groom. I am very simple, and extremely cheap! Why would I ever plan a day then, that would set me and my husband-to-be back thousands of dollars? Sounds like the wrong foot to start off a marriage on...according to me anyway!

Eric is a tightwad as well, so we get along great. (lol) But unlike me, he is very close to his very large family. Surely I have my mom, brother, an aunt and a grandma who I speak to daily, but aside from that handful, my family and I are quite distant. If I were given the task to name my cousins off the top of my head I couldn't even do that. So when I yelled "we're going to Vegas!" ten minutes after the ring went on my finger, I saw him cringe.

So I decided that a marriage, like any relationship, is a series of compromises. I would plan the big day, when his 15 aunts and uncles and 20 cousins would all gather to see our exchanging of vows. Also, he had his heart set on a Hawaiian honeymoon...and I hate the beach. I'm a city girl! I'd much rather go to New York City and experience the big apple after our wedding....but again, I "compromised". Maybe I'll love 'paradise' when I get there??

In true Danielle fashion, I had to begin planning and budgeting right away. I went out the next morning with my closest girlfriends to try on dresses. I thought I had found it! Two months later I have changed the dress twice...

I couldn't sleep for three weeks at least. How in the world would we be able to scrape up the money for this big party? That question is still unanswered. Wouldn't this money better be spent on paying off our credit cards and starting our life together debt free? I still think it would.

I chose seven bridesmaids initially. I could leave none of my best friends out! One has since 86'd herself from my life, along with the flower girl. Now I have six, a great number, who will be standing alongside me. But I feel like a bridezilla nagging my fiance to choose who will be standing next to him. I have a list of who I think he should pick to round out his six, but he is apprehensive about committing to these men because some of them have been less than reliable in the past...But I am offended that he has yet to ask them to be in our wedding. I question his reasoning, but he isn't budging. Ahhhh!!

He says that I can plan the whole thing and he will go along with whatever I'd like, but that is exactly what is NOT happening! He wants big, springtime, local, Hawaii, mismatched bridal party; I want small, winter/fall, Vegas, New York, matching bridal party numbers...

I hope he can compromise for me a little bit. As for now, I am rolling with the punches and just working in little jabs about how he is getting his way on everything. Writing this now, though makes me realize that I need to put my foot down on something. Maybe it shouldn't be who stands on his side though.

I did choose the ceremony and reception sites...with him. Luckily we found places that are affordable AND beautiful. When he insisted on spring, I chose the spring date to fall on my late father's birthday, which he went along with without any fight. So in a roundabout way I am getting my way. I just don't want to turn into an overbearing bride who is controlling, but since he wants to invest so much effort and money, I don't want it to be ghetto!

Any advice on how to approach my love about why he should *compromise* on his groom's men? (All I really want is for him to add ONE mutual friend of ours-whose wife is already standing on my side)

D